his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.