We are two peas in an std pod
Send us your Text From Last Night!
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.