I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice