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Send us your Text From Last Night!
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.