I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.