First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
So much Jack, so little girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.