She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.