I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Send us your Text From Last Night!
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!