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I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off