I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
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I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
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Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
When did angry sex become our thing?
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.