When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends