It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
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She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
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I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.