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you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
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