Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.