my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
These Little Things Make People Overly Angry
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
you didnt know i had herpes?
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
These Medical Professionals Recall the Worst Cases of Hypochondria They’ve Seen