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just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
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