At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.