you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious