okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday