New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
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you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
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You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in