Texts From Last Night

Texts from December, 2012

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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I have major gossip for you.

  (1-570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Oh no, did you have sex last night?

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.

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  (570): I have major gossip for you. (1-570): Oh no, did you have sex last night? (570): If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited. http://tfl.nu/1upd
  Replies (8) Good night (1261) Bad night (334)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...

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  (210): my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me... http://tfl.nu/0ufz
  Replies (5) Good night (932) Bad night (257) Order T-Shirt
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building

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  (410): Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building http://tfl.nu/wjxy
  Replies (3) Good night (879) Bad night (236) Order T-Shirt
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.

  (404): View more from Georgia

  My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.

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  (770): There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese. (404): My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe. http://tfl.nu/muox
  Replies (15) Good night (2659) Bad night (257)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.

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  (210): Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often. http://tfl.nu/cowe
  Replies (14) Good night (778) Bad night (253)
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  (518): View more from New York

  And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window

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  (518): And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window http://tfl.nu/vqxj
  Replies (1) Good night (756) Bad night (261) Order T-Shirt
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real

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  (319): God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real http://tfl.nu/8qp8
  Replies (2) Good night (1356) Bad night (227) Order T-Shirt
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  (509): View more from Washington

  I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'

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  (509): I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?' http://tfl.nu/4a3m
  Replies (7) Good night (1866) Bad night (278) Order T-Shirt
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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.

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  (864): Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you. http://tfl.nu/kfw2
  Replies (2) Good night (633) Bad night (249) Order T-Shirt
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there

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  (775): He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there http://tfl.nu/7cfh
  Replies (8) Good night (768) Bad night (244) Order T-Shirt
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  (254): View more from Texas

  I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look

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  (254): I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look http://tfl.nu/jucs
  Replies (4) Good night (695) Bad night (354) Order T-Shirt
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.

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  (540): Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot. http://tfl.nu/omko
  Replies (8) Good night (1585) Bad night (240)
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink

  (815): View more from Illinois

  I care about my drink far more than her feelings

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  (507): I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink (815): I care about my drink far more than her feelings http://tfl.nu/v6if
  Replies (3) Good night (1379) Bad night (240)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...

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  (804): It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left... http://tfl.nu/rixb
  Replies (7) Good night (282) Bad night (713)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.

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  (+44): When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god. http://tfl.nu/0ncl
  Replies (0) Good night (392) Bad night (733) Order T-Shirt