I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
