If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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