You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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