I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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