No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize