We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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