spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
