I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Randomize
