My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
The power of my boobs compel you
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
