My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
North Korea, Best Korea!
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
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All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
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