im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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