I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
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