You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
