I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
