He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
