She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize
