Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I will be naked everywhere
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
