I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
