forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
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