You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Dear god my vagina.
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