I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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