i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
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