i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
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