I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Randomize
