what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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