Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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