..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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