16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
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