we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
