I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
